Priorities

I have this note stuck to the side of my monitor.

It’s a useful reminder when I’m trying to decide between the myriad different things I could (and probably should) be doing at any moment.

It goes like this:

Priorities

• Self
• Family
• Friends
• Clients
• Prospects
• Others

For example:

• writing a proposal > writing a blog post
• preparing for a workshop > writing a proposal
• checking in on a friend > preparing for a workshop
• helping my son practice the piano > checking in on a friend
• taking time to meditate > helping my son practice the piano

If this list seems self-centred, consider turning it upside down.

With a nod to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and Nonviolent Communication you could say that making progress and makign the world “okay” starts with me. If I’m hungry, tired, angry, upset, distracted, I’m no good to anyone. Even the Buddhist practice of metta starts with one’s self.

Gandhi had things to say on this topic, too:

“Keep your thoughts positive because your thought become your words.
Keep your words positive because your words become your behaviour
Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits
Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values
Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny”

– Mathatma Gandhi

My body supports my thinking which supports my actions, which supports my family, my friends, my clients, my community, my planet, etc. When my family is happy, it enables me to go make friends and have a social life. When my personal social network is solid, I can do great work with my clients. If I’m serving my clients well then I’ve earned the right to look for more clients. If I don’t have any prospects, I can turn my attention to new people that I don’t know and see if they might someday move further up the list of priority groups.

As William Butler Yeats said, “A stranger is a friend you haven’t met yet.”

It’s a bit like the agile game “Circles and Soup” where we try to identify and move items of dissatisfaction towards increasing levels of influence and control. Before I do anything, I like to ask myself “Is this the most wholesome and beneficial decision I can make? Will it help me achieve my longer term goals in even the smallest of ways?”

A lot of folks can do this automatically but I find I need some prompts and reminders. Having a solid morning routine definitely helps. So does the sticky note on my monitor and even this blog post. 😊